I want to tell you a story about fear;
I have so many from which to choose.
I can tell you the one that makes
my fingers hide into my palms,
fear that everyone will unfurl from me
like leaves from autumn branches.
shaking my head and swallowing my lips
as much as my mind’s constant
turning of this cold thought:it’s all been the wrong choice
how I got here, why I’m here,
why I’ve left so many places;
this doubt now that homemay not be home and now
where is it that I should go?
Still, this is not my best story
my greatest fear. I want to tell you
about the one the that stops my breath
hunches my shoulders to my neck:
this worry that stops and unmoves me:
I have nothing to offer.
There exist far prettier faces,
countless more brilliant minds.
I have no talent for art or song.
I have only these words and yet
in other hands this story would be a poem,
sounding like bells in crisp winter air.
This is the doubt that closes my throat.
I have and will never make a difference.
Anne Marie’s day job is working as a UX Specialist for a publishing company. In her free time, she likes trying new things, such as improv comedy, and pursuing happy activities, like writing, taking pictures, and traveling. You can follow her as she pursues her newest goal of novice blogger at betterthannice.
Fear Confessions is a series of essays by creatives who share personal stories about facing their fears. It’s a celebration of vulnerability.